Kyler Murray Should Hire Me As His Personal Decision Maker

In case you were living under a rock there was some news that broke today regarding this year’s winner of the Heisman Trophy:

You might think the story here is Murray choosing the more dangerous, barbaric, league with a notoriously short career length better sport to play.

It is not.

Exhibit A:

Let the record show I know what is best for professional athlete’s lives and career decisions. Agents? Overrated. Friends? Forget about them. Family? Don’t know shit. But as I played one whole season of varsity football (still waiting on my first D1 offer) I knew where Kyler’s heart was at- without ever even meeting him.

Some might call it luck.

I call it a gift.

I’m an athlete whisperer.

A little reverse psychology on this one; they don’t teach you that in the classroom!


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